Hope And Worry

Early in October, I had three blogposts entitled The Worries of Tomorrow, The Troubles of Today, and Another Day; preceded by a Quotation (41/09) from the Bible about worrying; or rather about NOT to worry about tomorrow, "for tomorrow will worry about itself". You'll find the posts in the Blog Archive for October.

The gist of it all (in those blogposts) was that I found that a bit more worrying "yesterday" would for once have been in place, before accompanying my dad on a visit to the hospital, which turned out just energy-consuming, irritating, exhausting, unproductive and a general waste of time for everyone involved, because of lack of proper planning, and too much optimism.

Now it's time for a new attempt. I can only hope I have worried enough in advance this time! The blood samples got taken last time (should have been taken a week before that, and could have been done elsewhere, but weren't). Tomorrow, home care staff will be accompanying dad all the way to take care of all the practical assistance he needs. (Which I can't provide because of my own chronic pain problems. Which last time's experiences proved.) A little while ago I phoned the home care organizer and checked that we still agree on this and that proper preparations have been made by them this time. I will meet up to sit in on the actual talk with the doctor; that's all. (Which will probably be more than enough for me for one day.)

Until that is over and done with, I will try and resist my inner urges to waste more energy on attempts to resuscitate my dead computer (see yesterday's post). It is unlikely to get any deader than it already is by waiting a bit. 

Another Day

I'm still really tired after the adventures of the day before yesterday (see The Troubles of Today 6 Oct) - and this whole tomorrow-today-yesterday thing is getting really confusing now! I will have to think of some other kind of heading soon...

I was made aware by comments from concerned friends on the last two posts, that it might perhaps be a good idea to repeat the facts that I myself suffer from chronic pain in neck-shoulder-arm, and that my dad has problems walking (among other things - it is a neurological problem). It was too far for him to walk within the hospital, and I can't push a wheelchair, and these facts combined caused A LOT of problems - which I really should have foreseen more clearly than I did (and protested more loudly than I did about the arrangements, or lack of, in this case). I probably would have, if I had had a bit more time to think than just finding out about the appointment half a day in advance... Hence I also had not seen the letter which said quite clearly that blood samples should be taken a week before the doctor's appointment. Home care staff missed that line, which made the whole extremely tiresome day quite meaningless, because without the test results the doctor of course could say nothing. This is what I had in mind in the last post when I argued that "worrying" a bit more beforehand, in this particular case, might actually have helped...

Yesterday, I tried to call home care to discuss how to avoid this kind of thing next time, but of course the Right Someone was on holiday for the rest of the week. (Aren't they always...) I did talk to Someone Else, but had better try again next week to get hold of Ms. More-Directly-In-Charge to make sure. So it's still hanging over me.

Today I was still feeling strangely extraordinarily stressed... It kept getting worse until in the late afternoon it dawned on me that I had forgotten to take my blood pressure pills in the morning.  (The fact that I forgot to take them still indicates stress...)

This was another depressing post to write and probably to read. I don't want to write stuff like this. I want to write fun-to-read stuff. I hope I'll be able to get back to that soon. Thanks for listening.