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Beyond the Lone Islands

http://dawntreader-island2.blogspot.com

Tuesday, 21 July 2009

Recharging Or Procrastinating?


Last week's statue-hunt was a lot of fun. Putting a camera between you and the world is a rather effective way of allowing yourself to focus only on certain details, and shut out the rest. I also spent time in front of the computer, trying to arrange, rearrange and edit pictures. Most of the functions in the photo editing programs are still "Greek" to me, though. (That is, I recognize a word here or there, but I can't use enough of them together to make any sense of it!)

This week, the theme at Soaring... is "silly critters". Unfortunately, live animals are a lot harder to chase than statues...

So "reality" is beginning to creep up on me again. There still remains a lot to do and deal with, related to the death of my mother. Estate inventory and what not. Since I filed the tax returns for both of my parents a few months ago, it might not be too complicated, once I get round to it. I've just been feeling very tired and in need of "recharging my battieries" before dealing with more phone calls and paperwork and meetings. (I do intend to get professional help sorting out the details.)

So last week I took a deliberate sort of a break (without really going away). This week I intended to "get back to business"; only to find that I'm becoming quite an expert at procrastination...

When I have something important to do, first of all I need to have things tidy around me, or else I can't concentrate. So that's usually my starting point. But often, while tidying up - shuffling papers around etc - you find something else that for some reason or other you feel you had perhaps also better do something about before you start with that other thing that you originally intended to do... And then when you've finished with that, you suddenly find you inner batteries discharged again, and you have to go and lie down for a rest, or take a walk, or have a meal, before you do anything else. And of course, all of these are tiring activites in their own way. (Yes, even lying down for a rest! Because sometimes you fall asleep and stay that way a good deal longer than you had in mind...)

Monday morning, I did make a good start at shuffling papers, but my thoughts were really still on photography. Among the stacks of papers were some envelopes with photo prints that I intend to put into albums. Putting these in order made me remember that there were some prints missing, that I had "borrowed" from these envelopes for other purposes, and that needed to be replaced. So then - "while I remember" - I started to experiment with printing photos from my new printer. Which of course was a lot more fun than tax return forms. Before I knew it, it was time for lunch, and a rest, and a walk...

I also got a letter from a friend recently, in which she told me she had rearranged photos on her notice board, to rid herself of some negative energy - i.e. had removed pictures of certain people, the sight of whom only reminded her of trouble right now. This in turn reminded me that I had not even put my board up since I moved (last year!); partly because I couldn't find a good place for it, partly because a lot of the photos were so old that they represented "the past" rather than my present circle of friends. (Babies on those photos now having reached their teens, and teenagers having grown up into adults, etc. For some reason, after a certain age, people stop taking family pictures to send to their friends at Christmas; and so remain forever young.)

Inspired by my friend's letter, and the excellent photo print quality of my new machine, I put other things aside again to search my computer for more recent photos of friends and family. Then having found some, and printed them out, I had to go into town to find an alternative to my old photo board, and maybe some frames. And thinking of frames, why not bring that drawing that a friend in Germany sent me for Christmas, and have that framed, too...

Instead of a notice board, I found a sort of metallic strip to which one can attach photos with magnets. Looks kind of cool, and doesn't take up much wall space. But of course it still took some time to find the right place for it. And rearrange other stuff around it. And put up the photos. And move those around to find the best positions...
And then blog about the whole thing...

Now, where was I? Oh, yes. Shuffling papers... Oh well. Tomorrow is another day...

2 comments:

Dan Felstead said...

Dawn Treader...

If I might...I will offer some support and advice...take it or leave it! I am sure estate matters are totally different in Sweden than they are here but I think the basics apply. We have just gone through what you are writing about. My wifes father passed away 1 and a half years ago. She was an only child...should be a simple matter right? WRONG! She took care of all of the paperwork and she did have to get the help of an attorney. She had days just as you are describing and I think a part of it is just dealing with the loss but having to also move forward with the Estate at the same time...very stressful. Here in the states...it took over a year to close out finally. But I just wanted to tell you that your feelings right now are not out of the ordinary and only time will help take care of them...at least that is what we have found. Hang in there...dealing with a loss like this is a period that we all must go through...no way around it but I promise...with time it will get better.

On the photo issue...you are doing great with the pictures and with photo software...there is a learning curve but it is almost exactly like learning a language....at first nothing makes sense but with time and practice...one day it clicks and it is downhill from there! Hang in there....

Your Blogging friends will help you..
Dan

DawnTreader said...

Dan - Thanks! You're right, of course. On one level I'm well aware of the details all being part of a bigger process. At the same time one is still struggling with each detail, not always seeing how exactly that thing relates to all the rest. (Applies to life and photo software both!)

About the estate, since my father still lives, it all goes to him. This pushes some problems into the future but causes other ones instead, since his memory etc has been rapidly failing over the past year. It is on his behalf that I'm dealing with the paperwork now. I've got power of attorney at the bank to pay bills etc; but I'm not a legal guardian entitled to make all decisions for him. I/we have support from my brother too, but he lives farther away.

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